How to Become Impotent - Free of Charge, No SMS Needed

So, I figured I’d treat myself to a Tesla Sphere (for those clueless, it’s this badass glass orb with lightning bolts zapping inside, and if you drag your finger across the surface, the electric charge chases after it like a hungry beast). Anyway, I messed around with my hand for a bit, but damn, that got boring fast. So, I thought, why not spice things up and rub my dick on it? Big mistake. Next thing I know, I get a fucking electric shock right to the tip—zapped my junk good. Now, my cock won’t even twitch, not even for the nastiest porn out there. I’m freaking out, fam. What a disgrace. 😢
#wtf #fail #shocked #dumbass