D23. Hey, shame on me, I need some raw advice. Should I keep the gifts and toys from my exes? I’ve piled up quite a stash from all my past flings, and I’m wondering if it’s totally lame to hold onto this sentimental crap.

👍 - Hell yeah, it’s cringe - toss that shit out or dump it at an orphanage!
🤣 - Keep it, who gives a damn!
#relationshipdrama #exmemories #cringeornot #letitgo

Alright, so check this out, I’m M.17, rolling with my crew—two of my bros and a couple of chicks we vibe with. Man, no clue what kinda wild hair got up our asses, but we figured, screw it, let’s dive into this sketchy-ass river (heads up: it’s basically a sewer dump). We stripped down to our skivvies, no shame in our game. I cannonballed in first, splashing like a damn fool, followed by one of my dudes. Then the two girls jumped in, while our last bro played cameraman, capturing the chaos.

Get this, there were these two old geezers, like 50-something, also swimming in this cesspool, and they straight-up asked our camera guy to film them. Meanwhile, one of our girls stubs her toe, bends over to check it out, and—bam—our bro with the camera swings it right to her ass, zooming in like a perv on a mission.

After we all crawled out of that nasty water, one of my soaked bros peels off his drenched undies, slaps on some shorts commando-style, and starts twirling his wet drawers over his head like he’s some damn cowboy with a lasso. Absolute madness, I’m dying! 🤣
#wtfmoment #riverdisaster #wildcrew #cringelaughs

I threw up a wild ad on Avito, screaming, "I’ll dump a steaming pile right at your enemy’s doorstep!" Thought it was just a sick joke, tossed it out there, and forgot about it. But holy crap, people are actually hitting me up, ready to shell out 500 rubles for this twisted service! They send the address, I sneak into the building like a goddamn ninja, hunt down the target apartment, drop the load, and snap a pic of the glorious "deposit" for proof. 😂
#prankster #savage #wtf #darkhumor

D21. About a month back, I got roped into a wild ride with my bestie and a couple of her shady acquaintances. Two of them, total strangers, and somehow, after cruising around, we ended up in a damn sauna, of all places. We were already half-sloshed, the night a blurry mess of laughter and bad decisions. Long story short, I ended up screwing one of the guys in the heat of the moment.

Fast forward to now—I took a test, and guess what? It’s positive. Too late to back out with an abortion, the window’s slammed shut. As for that guy, no dice—he’s already crawled back to his ex, leaving me high and dry.

Now I’m stuck mulling over whether to slink back to my old flame, the one I had a long, messy history with. He’s got health issues, can’t have kids of his own, which might work in my favor. We could play happy family, but I’m torn—do I spill the ugly truth about this mess, or keep my trap shut and hope for the best?

😐-Dump the kid in an orphanage once it’s born
👍🏻-Shack up with the ex and fake it
😢-Go solo and raise the little gremlin myself
#unexpectedpregnancy #baddecisions #lifechoices #drama

P24. I've been shacking up with my chick for a year now. Things are solid, but she’s dead-set against tying the knot. She’s all like, “I’m good without that official bullshit.” Meanwhile, I’m over here dreaming of the whole package—wife, kids, white picket fence, the classic deal. She’s not pushing me, but I can’t shake the feeling we’re on totally different fucking paths. I’m hanging in there, but for how long? No damn clue. What’s your take, peeps?

😐-She’s fuckin’ weird, dump her ass and find someone normal
🤣-Dude, you’re a moron, enjoy the ride while you’re still young and free
#relationshipdrama #marriageissues #loveandconflict #lifechoices

I’m stuck in this damn apartment block, and the neighbors upstairs are banging like wild animals every freaking night. Last night, for instance, they were going at it hardcore until 4 a.m., screwing with my sleep big time. Yo, shameless crew, hit me with some advice on how to deal with this crap:

👍 - Storm up there mid-action and tell ‘em to shut the hell up.
🤣 - Sneak up and take a dump right outside their door, no words needed.
#noisyneighbors #sleeplessnights #wtf #revenge

Is it worth throwing punches over a chick? I’m straight-up thinking it’s absolute bullshit, but my girl’s got a different take. She’s like, “What if my ex rolls up outta nowhere and starts talking shit to you? What you gonna do then?” I’m just like, “Yo, y’all sort your own damn drama. What’s he gonna ‘come at me’ for? For what reason?” Long story short, she hit me with the “You’re weak as a man” line. Lmao, for real?

😐 - She’s got a point, I guess.
👍 - Dump her ass, no cap.
#relationshipdrama #manup #toxicvibes #wtf

A wild kid rolled into the dump of a school, sporting massive ear tunnels that could fit a damn truck. First day in, some savage classmates slapped a padlock through one of those gaping holes, snapped it shut, and flushed the key down the shitter with a wicked laugh. After that, the poor bastard vanished—poof, gone like a ghost in the night.
#prankgonewrong #earpiercing #savage #schoolbullies

So, I splurged on a kickass bouquet for my girl's birthday—tomorrow’s the big day. Dropped a cool 10k on those blooms, ya know, to make her feel like a queen. Planned to roll up in the morning and hand them over with flair. Left the flowers chilling overnight in a bucket of water in the bathroom, thinking they’d stay fresh.

Fast forward to morning, I check on ‘em, and holy shit—disaster! My drunk-ass dad, in some fucked-up stupor, legit took a dump in the damn bucket. Petals drowning in crap, and he’s passed out cold, no clue why the hell he’d do this insanity. I’m pissed, but also kinda losing it laughing at the absurdity. 😡😂

Now I’m on a mission to scrub the literal shit outta these flowers, make ‘em presentable, and still surprise my girl. Fingers crossed I can pull off this stinking miracle, damn it!
#whathefuck #disaster #familydrama #birthdayfail

Today, I witnessed a damn wild scene—a grimy homeless dude squatting in the bushes, taking a massive dump right into a plastic bag. With that stinking bundle of filth slung over his shoulder like a trophy, he strutted straight toward the nearest "Magnit" store. Bold as hell, he marched in, planted his nasty little bomb in a locker, slammed it shut, locked it tight, and strolled out with the key in hand like he owned the place.
#wtf #gross #publicnuisance #shocking

D23. Hey there! So, I’ve got a boyfriend, and here’s the wild-ass story of how shit went down. We were chilling with some Tuvans—y’know, those hardcore motherfuckers who don’t mess around. Anyway, we were partying hard by the lake, grilling up a storm with some shashlik. Hours later, I find out I’ve been scarfing down goddamn fried dog meat, not lamb like they told me. And guess what? My boyfriend fuckin’ knew all along...

😐-Eh, whatever, no big deal
👍-Dump his sorry ass
#cultureclash #wtf #foodshock #relationshipdrama

A wild confession about a shitty situation in a hospital bathroom
Back in 7th grade, I found myself in a dire predicament while taking a massive dump in a hospital. No toilet paper in sight, and I wasn’t about to leave my masterpiece unwiped. Thinking on my feet, I snatched a grimy rag dangling from the janitor’s drying rack near the radiator in the john. I smeared a glorious streak of filth on it, then hung it back up, crap-side facing the heater. Soon enough, the stench hit like a freight train, and the poor cleaning lady was cursing up a storm when she caught a whiff.
Still burns me with shame to this day. 😢
#epicfail #bathroomdisaster #cringemoment #shameless

My brother ditched town for studies, dumping his cat on me like I’m some damn pet sitter.
Two months later, this guy has the audacity to text me— “Sell the cat, I don’t need it anymore.”
I’m freaking floored! I took her in, raised her, fed her, got attached, and he just spits out “sell her” like she’s trash.
Screw that! I blocked his sorry ass and kept the cat. Shame on this so-called “owner” for being such a heartless jerk!
#PetLove #heartless #catmom #screwyou

My damn roommate in this rented shithole keeps dragging his chick over. And not just for cuddles—oh no, they’re banging so hard my ears are damn near bleeding. These paper-thin walls can’t block shit, and his bed creaks like a haunted fucking house straight out of a slasher flick, all at 2 a.m. I lost it one night, banged on the wall for some peace, and it went dead silent. Then this asshole slides into our shared chat with, “Don’t knock, folks, we’re making love here.” What the hell do I do, you degenerates??

🌭 - Earplugs, man, just get some fucking earplugs
🤣 - Take a dump right at his door
👍 - Blast some ear-shattering, balls-to-the-wall noise back at ‘em
#roommatehell #noisyfuckers #thinwalls #sleeplessnights

Got a gig as a designer at some shady-ass company. I’m grinding away, crafting logos and banners, thinking everything’s cool. Then, boom, I find out my sleazy boss is flipping my work to freelancers on the side for a fortune while tossing me mere crumbs. Get this—I’m making stuff for 2k, and this asshole is charging clients 15k without even blinking. When I confronted him about this bullshit, he had the nerve to spew crap about how I’m “still learning.”

😐 - Suck it up, kid, and build your resume
👍 - Tell him to fuck off, post your work on freelance platforms, and take a dump on his desk for good measure
#shadybusiness #exploitation #fucktheboss #freelancehustle

📌 ChatGPT vs. My DIY Cleanup Script: Who Cleans Up Better?

Some time ago, while studying bash scripts, I tried to delve deeper into the topic and looked for more practice by solving any, even the smallest, tasks. One of these was a script that deletes temporary files, old dumps, folders node_modulesfrom long-forgotten projects. I found it the other day comp...

🔗 Подробнее: https://www.roastdev.com/p...

So, my mom got herself a new man, some dude named Uncle Borya, stepping into the role of stepdad, since my real dad’s been six feet under for five damn years. This guy moves in, and at first, he seems alright, not a total asshole. But then, one night, he gets completely hammered, stinking of cheap vodka, and I overhear him in the kitchen, slurring to my mom, “Why don’t we dump Nikita in an orphanage and pop out a fresh kid of our own?” My mom’s like, “Are you out of your fucking mind?” And this bastard just shrugs and says he ain’t wasting his cash or energy raising someone else’s “seed.”

By the way, Nikita—that’s me, a 14-year-old just trying to survive this shitshow.
If they don’t ship me off to some hellhole orphanage, I’ll update y’all.
#familydrama #stepdadproblems #wtf #teenstruggles

So, I’ve got this buddy, just 20 years old, and some bastard leaked a wild-ass video into our group chat. It’s his chick, 18 and feisty, chilling at some random pad, blindfolded, cackling like a hyena while she’s jerking off some dude’s sad, limp dick.
Then, boom, she rips off the blindfold, shrieks, “Holy shit, who the hell is this?!”—and the whole damn room erupts, laughing their asses off, clapping like it’s the prank of the century.
My boy, absolutely floored, just stares at her and goes,
“Are you fucking insane? What the hell was that?”
And she, with a straight face, cool as a cucumber, hits him with,
“Bro, chill, it’s just a joke! We messed around, no big deal—why blow it out of proportion?”

So, what’s the verdict, fam? He’s still with her, acting like nothing happened, just cruising along like it’s all good.

😐 - Eh, just a prank, who cares
👍 - Dump that skank
#drama #prankgonewrong #wtf #messy

Alright, let me pitch you a wild-ass idea. Imagine this: we snatch up some deserted island, a real goddamn nowhere. Then, we dump a bunch of folks there for six straight months, including:

- hardcore Brooklyn gangstas
- fiery Latinos with attitude
- our own local badasses, no flags attached
- some hardcore Taliban or Mujahideen fighters

And for 183 straight episodes, these crews battle it out to claim the turf, argue over whose god is the real deal, and hash out all the gritty shit that defines life. I’d binge the hell outta this chaos. Just can’t nail a name for it yet.

😐 - What a load of crap
🤣 - Hell yeah, I’d stream this madness
#realitytv #survivalshow #cultureclash #epicbattle

I still remember being in eighth grade, just a tiny thing, getting admitted to the hospital. I was young, but I’d overheard the grown-ups whispering about suspected cancer and the looming possibility of surgery. When I broke the news to my homeroom teacher that I’d be out sick, she gave me this cold, lingering stare. Then, out of nowhere, she launched into a grim tale about a girl from one of her past classes. Said the girl looked just like me, got struck down by cancer, strutted into school bald as a cue ball, and then—bam—dropped dead. To this day, I can’t wrap my head around why that grown-ass woman thought it was fine to dump such a gut-punch of a story on a kid like me.
#trauma #insensitive #childhoodmemories #wtf

My boyfriend stabbed me in the back by screwing around with my little sister. I stumbled upon the filthy truth when I found his phone abandoned in the bathroom, spilling all their dirty secrets. And the real gut-punch? She had the audacity to smirk and say, “You couldn’t handle him, babe, so I stepped in to save the day.” I’m itching to bolt outta here, but we’re shackled to this damn apartment lease, and I’m drowning in debt. What the hell do I do, fam?

😐 - Swallow your pride, clear the debts, then disappear into the sunset.
👍 - Pack your shit, and before you slam the door, take a literal dump on their bed. 💩
#betrayal #cheatingdrama #familyscandal #revenge

📌 Turbocharge Your Queries with COUNT DISTINCT: A Clever Data Dump Hack

SQL COUNT DISTINCT has been slow. It is, in essence, a grouping operation, which keeps traversed grouping field values for later comparisons. When the result set is too large, the data needs to be written to the hard disk and buffered, resulting in low performance.If data is sorted by the deduplicat...

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I've been dating this chick for half a year now, and lately, I’ve caught her hanging out way too much with some shady dude from her job. I confront her, like, "What the hell is this?" and she brushes it off with, "Chill, he’s just a friend, don’t flip out." Then yesterday, I swing by her workplace to pick her up, and what do I see? This creep has his arm around her waist, whispering sweet nothings in her ear like they’re in some damn romance flick. Should I storm over and start a freaking brawl right there, or play it cool and pretend I’m blind to this bullshit?

😐-Smash this guy’s face in
🤣-Give her a piece of my mind
👍-Just tell her to fuck off and dump her ass
#drama #cheating #relationshiphell #wtf

Been shacking up with this dude for two damn years, and he still can’t get his head around my birthday. I’ve even set reminders for his sorry ass, dropped not-so-subtle hints, and straight-up told him. Then, the big day rolls around, he stumbles in from work—empty-handed, no flowers, no nothing. First thing outta his mouth? “Got anything to eat, babe?” I’m like, “Yo, do you even know what today is?” And he snaps back with, “Don’t fucking annoy me.” Later, he finally remembers it’s my birthday, but doesn’t even bother with a half-assed “congrats.” What the hell do I do with this guy? I’ve gone out of my way to celebrate his sorry ass with thoughtful gifts and sweet words, but this is how he repays me?

😐 - Screw it, forget his birthday too
👍 - Dump his ungrateful ass
😢 - Whatever, suck it up and deal
#relationshipdrama #birthdayblues #toxiclove #dump him

Man, this chick ain’t lifting a damn finger around the house! We’ve been shacked up for 2 years, and all she does is stuff her face, take dumps, and crash out. Quit her job too, whining about how they didn’t “value” her sorry ass. So now what? I’m stuck slaving at work and still gotta clean up this goddamn pigsty. Don’t even get me started on cooking—forget it. And sex? Fucking 1-2 times a week if I’m lucky, and even then, I gotta beg for it like a desperate mutt.

😐 - Eh, whatever, everyone’s stuck in this shitshow.
👍 - Dump her useless ass, why the hell keep her around?
#relationshiphell #lazyass #breakupnow #wtf

Summer of 2005. I’m just a scrawny kid with a jacked-up gut (constipation dragging on for a week or two, no less). Mom hands me some laxative, says, “Go play outside,” like that’s not a recipe for disaster. What could possibly go wrong, right? :) Nah, I didn’t shit myself on the street, but damn, it got close. The urge hit me like a freight train, so I bolted home, sweating bullets, waiting forever for Mom to buzz me in through the intercom, then for the freaking elevator to show up...

And guess what? I couldn’t hold it. I wasn’t about to ruin my undies, so as the inevitable started slipping out, I yanked ‘em down and unleashed a steaming pile—right in front of the elevator door. The very second that turd hit the concrete with a glorious thud, the elevator doors slid open, and there they were: three pairs of stunned, gorgeous eyes staring right at me in absolute horror.

Drop a 👍 if you wanna hear about the time I took a dump in a bulletproof vest, smack in the middle of the road during winter.
#epicfail #shithappens #cringemoment #childhoodtrauma

I dumped my guy, and that very same night, I hopped into bed with another stud.
He’s screaming “cheating,” claiming I had this whole thing mapped out like some devious mastermind.
But how the hell is it cheating when we’re already done and dusted?

😐 - Total slut
👍 - No big deal, move on
#breakupdrama #noshamenogame #movingonfast #savagevibes

I’m hustling in the delivery game, grinding hard. This chick snatches her order, then has the audacity to hit me up on the app claiming, “Yo, nothing showed up!”—and scams a refund. Boom, my cash gets docked. What the hell do I do?

😐 - Just swallow the L, chalk it up to the game, and move on?
👍 - Roll back to her spot and take a damn dump right on her doorstep for the disrespect.
#deliverydrama #scammeralert #pettyrevenge #screwthis

My brother's wife is a real venomous snake. She’s always slithering into family matters, hissing vile nonsense, and turning our mother against everyone with her toxic whispers. Just the other day, my brother left his phone on the table, and I stumbled upon a voice message that made my blood boil: "I’ll dump your old hag of a mother in a nursing home if you keep dragging your feet on the apartment deal."
And yet, the poor bastard loves her, blind to her true colors.

👍 - Send him the damn recording, let him face the truth.
😐 - Keep my mouth shut, let them figure out this shitshow on their own.
#familydrama #toxicrelationship #betrayal #snakepit

I was shacked up with this chick, splitting rent on a dumpy apartment. Then she bailed, and guess what? Turns out the sneaky little liar hadn’t paid her share for six damn months, just ghosting the landlord’s messages like a pro. And here I was, dumb as hell, wiring her the cash every time.

Now the landlord’s breathing down my neck for the debt, and it’s a whopping 200k. Screw me, right?

😢- Fork over the cash and erase that girl from memory
😐- Pay up, but send some muscle to teach her a lesson
#betrayal #debtcrisis #revenge #screwed