📌 ChatGPT vs. My DIY Cleanup Script: Who Cleans Up Better?

Some time ago, while studying bash scripts, I tried to delve deeper into the topic and looked for more practice by solving any, even the smallest, tasks. One of these was a script that deletes temporary files, old dumps, folders node_modulesfrom long-forgotten projects. I found it the other day comp...

🔗 Подробнее: https://www.roastdev.com/p...

So, my mom got herself a new man, some dude named Uncle Borya, stepping into the role of stepdad, since my real dad’s been six feet under for five damn years. This guy moves in, and at first, he seems alright, not a total asshole. But then, one night, he gets completely hammered, stinking of cheap vodka, and I overhear him in the kitchen, slurring to my mom, “Why don’t we dump Nikita in an orphanage and pop out a fresh kid of our own?” My mom’s like, “Are you out of your fucking mind?” And this bastard just shrugs and says he ain’t wasting his cash or energy raising someone else’s “seed.”

By the way, Nikita—that’s me, a 14-year-old just trying to survive this shitshow.
If they don’t ship me off to some hellhole orphanage, I’ll update y’all.
#familydrama #stepdadproblems #wtf #teenstruggles

So, I’ve got this buddy, just 20 years old, and some bastard leaked a wild-ass video into our group chat. It’s his chick, 18 and feisty, chilling at some random pad, blindfolded, cackling like a hyena while she’s jerking off some dude’s sad, limp dick.
Then, boom, she rips off the blindfold, shrieks, “Holy shit, who the hell is this?!”—and the whole damn room erupts, laughing their asses off, clapping like it’s the prank of the century.
My boy, absolutely floored, just stares at her and goes,
“Are you fucking insane? What the hell was that?”
And she, with a straight face, cool as a cucumber, hits him with,
“Bro, chill, it’s just a joke! We messed around, no big deal—why blow it out of proportion?”

So, what’s the verdict, fam? He’s still with her, acting like nothing happened, just cruising along like it’s all good.

😐 - Eh, just a prank, who cares
👍 - Dump that skank
#drama #prankgonewrong #wtf #messy

Alright, let me pitch you a wild-ass idea. Imagine this: we snatch up some deserted island, a real goddamn nowhere. Then, we dump a bunch of folks there for six straight months, including:

- hardcore Brooklyn gangstas
- fiery Latinos with attitude
- our own local badasses, no flags attached
- some hardcore Taliban or Mujahideen fighters

And for 183 straight episodes, these crews battle it out to claim the turf, argue over whose god is the real deal, and hash out all the gritty shit that defines life. I’d binge the hell outta this chaos. Just can’t nail a name for it yet.

😐 - What a load of crap
🤣 - Hell yeah, I’d stream this madness
#realitytv #survivalshow #cultureclash #epicbattle

I still remember being in eighth grade, just a tiny thing, getting admitted to the hospital. I was young, but I’d overheard the grown-ups whispering about suspected cancer and the looming possibility of surgery. When I broke the news to my homeroom teacher that I’d be out sick, she gave me this cold, lingering stare. Then, out of nowhere, she launched into a grim tale about a girl from one of her past classes. Said the girl looked just like me, got struck down by cancer, strutted into school bald as a cue ball, and then—bam—dropped dead. To this day, I can’t wrap my head around why that grown-ass woman thought it was fine to dump such a gut-punch of a story on a kid like me.
#trauma #insensitive #childhoodmemories #wtf

My boyfriend stabbed me in the back by screwing around with my little sister. I stumbled upon the filthy truth when I found his phone abandoned in the bathroom, spilling all their dirty secrets. And the real gut-punch? She had the audacity to smirk and say, “You couldn’t handle him, babe, so I stepped in to save the day.” I’m itching to bolt outta here, but we’re shackled to this damn apartment lease, and I’m drowning in debt. What the hell do I do, fam?

😐 - Swallow your pride, clear the debts, then disappear into the sunset.
👍 - Pack your shit, and before you slam the door, take a literal dump on their bed. 💩
#betrayal #cheatingdrama #familyscandal #revenge

📌 Turbocharge Your Queries with COUNT DISTINCT: A Clever Data Dump Hack

SQL COUNT DISTINCT has been slow. It is, in essence, a grouping operation, which keeps traversed grouping field values for later comparisons. When the result set is too large, the data needs to be written to the hard disk and buffered, resulting in low performance.If data is sorted by the deduplicat...

🔗 Подробнее: https://www.roastdev.com/p...

I've been dating this chick for half a year now, and lately, I’ve caught her hanging out way too much with some shady dude from her job. I confront her, like, "What the hell is this?" and she brushes it off with, "Chill, he’s just a friend, don’t flip out." Then yesterday, I swing by her workplace to pick her up, and what do I see? This creep has his arm around her waist, whispering sweet nothings in her ear like they’re in some damn romance flick. Should I storm over and start a freaking brawl right there, or play it cool and pretend I’m blind to this bullshit?

😐-Smash this guy’s face in
🤣-Give her a piece of my mind
👍-Just tell her to fuck off and dump her ass
#drama #cheating #relationshiphell #wtf

Been shacking up with this dude for two damn years, and he still can’t get his head around my birthday. I’ve even set reminders for his sorry ass, dropped not-so-subtle hints, and straight-up told him. Then, the big day rolls around, he stumbles in from work—empty-handed, no flowers, no nothing. First thing outta his mouth? “Got anything to eat, babe?” I’m like, “Yo, do you even know what today is?” And he snaps back with, “Don’t fucking annoy me.” Later, he finally remembers it’s my birthday, but doesn’t even bother with a half-assed “congrats.” What the hell do I do with this guy? I’ve gone out of my way to celebrate his sorry ass with thoughtful gifts and sweet words, but this is how he repays me?

😐 - Screw it, forget his birthday too
👍 - Dump his ungrateful ass
😢 - Whatever, suck it up and deal
#relationshipdrama #birthdayblues #toxiclove #dump him

Man, this chick ain’t lifting a damn finger around the house! We’ve been shacked up for 2 years, and all she does is stuff her face, take dumps, and crash out. Quit her job too, whining about how they didn’t “value” her sorry ass. So now what? I’m stuck slaving at work and still gotta clean up this goddamn pigsty. Don’t even get me started on cooking—forget it. And sex? Fucking 1-2 times a week if I’m lucky, and even then, I gotta beg for it like a desperate mutt.

😐 - Eh, whatever, everyone’s stuck in this shitshow.
👍 - Dump her useless ass, why the hell keep her around?
#relationshiphell #lazyass #breakupnow #wtf

Summer of 2005. I’m just a scrawny kid with a jacked-up gut (constipation dragging on for a week or two, no less). Mom hands me some laxative, says, “Go play outside,” like that’s not a recipe for disaster. What could possibly go wrong, right? :) Nah, I didn’t shit myself on the street, but damn, it got close. The urge hit me like a freight train, so I bolted home, sweating bullets, waiting forever for Mom to buzz me in through the intercom, then for the freaking elevator to show up...

And guess what? I couldn’t hold it. I wasn’t about to ruin my undies, so as the inevitable started slipping out, I yanked ‘em down and unleashed a steaming pile—right in front of the elevator door. The very second that turd hit the concrete with a glorious thud, the elevator doors slid open, and there they were: three pairs of stunned, gorgeous eyes staring right at me in absolute horror.

Drop a 👍 if you wanna hear about the time I took a dump in a bulletproof vest, smack in the middle of the road during winter.
#epicfail #shithappens #cringemoment #childhoodtrauma

I dumped my guy, and that very same night, I hopped into bed with another stud.
He’s screaming “cheating,” claiming I had this whole thing mapped out like some devious mastermind.
But how the hell is it cheating when we’re already done and dusted?

😐 - Total slut
👍 - No big deal, move on
#breakupdrama #noshamenogame #movingonfast #savagevibes

I’m hustling in the delivery game, grinding hard. This chick snatches her order, then has the audacity to hit me up on the app claiming, “Yo, nothing showed up!”—and scams a refund. Boom, my cash gets docked. What the hell do I do?

😐 - Just swallow the L, chalk it up to the game, and move on?
👍 - Roll back to her spot and take a damn dump right on her doorstep for the disrespect.
#deliverydrama #scammeralert #pettyrevenge #screwthis

My brother's wife is a real venomous snake. She’s always slithering into family matters, hissing vile nonsense, and turning our mother against everyone with her toxic whispers. Just the other day, my brother left his phone on the table, and I stumbled upon a voice message that made my blood boil: "I’ll dump your old hag of a mother in a nursing home if you keep dragging your feet on the apartment deal."
And yet, the poor bastard loves her, blind to her true colors.

👍 - Send him the damn recording, let him face the truth.
😐 - Keep my mouth shut, let them figure out this shitshow on their own.
#familydrama #toxicrelationship #betrayal #snakepit

I was shacked up with this chick, splitting rent on a dumpy apartment. Then she bailed, and guess what? Turns out the sneaky little liar hadn’t paid her share for six damn months, just ghosting the landlord’s messages like a pro. And here I was, dumb as hell, wiring her the cash every time.

Now the landlord’s breathing down my neck for the debt, and it’s a whopping 200k. Screw me, right?

😢- Fork over the cash and erase that girl from memory
😐- Pay up, but send some muscle to teach her a lesson
#betrayal #debtcrisis #revenge #screwed

Hey, Shame, let me spill the tea on my summer escapade. I was hustling as a waiter at this little café, and about a month and a half in, I caught the eye of this absolute stunner. Sparks flew, and we were sneaking flirty glances and quick make-out sessions like some steamy soap opera.

One late night, after my shift, I got stuck prepping ingredients in the kitchen. The place was a damn ghost town—everyone had bounced, and the boss had hightailed it outta there. So, I thought, why the hell not? I texted my girl to sneak into the kitchen for a little after-hours action. And let me tell you, it went down exactly as I’d fantasized—hot, messy, and unforgettable.

Everything seemed like a flawless heist… until I found out there was a freakin’ camera in the kitchen. Turns out, the director liked to play Big Brother and review the footage every couple of days. Next thing I know, I’m getting the boot—fired on the spot. Oh, and they stiffed me on my last two weeks’ pay, the cheap bastards.

To top off this glorious shitshow, my girl dumped me faster than a hot potato, saying she ain’t got time for a broke-ass boyfriend with no job.

Started out like a damn fairy tale, but crashed and burned into a straight-up tragedy.
#kitchenromance #caughtoncamera #fired #heartbreak

Been shacking up with my girl for nearly a year, but just found out she’s been sneaking off to crash at her ex’s place now and then. Her excuse? “We just sleep, babe, there’s history there, you wouldn’t get it.” Not cheating, she claims, but it makes my skin crawl with disgust.
What the hell do I do next?

👍- Dump her ass and don’t look back
🤣- Sit her down, keep my cool, and figure out what kind of twisted nonsense they’ve got going on
#relationshipdrama #cheatingornot #toxicvibes #whatnow

Hey, shame squad, I’ve been hit with a total shitstorm. I’m grinding through military training and was in a solid 4-year relationship. Come August, I was all set to tie the knot, everything was smooth sailing—until my so-called buddy dropped a bombshell. He straight-up told me to dump my chick, and then he showed me their chats. Turns out, she’s confessing her love to him and sending spicy, no-holds-barred pics. I didn’t waste a second overthinking it—I kicked her to the curb. Now, two months later, this same “friend” hits me up, casually dropping that he’s dating her. So, shame crew, what’s the move? Do I tell this backstabbing bastard to fuck off (even though we were tight as hell), or just swallow this bitter pill like a man?

😐 - Screw the guy, that’s a low blow
👍 - Nah, he’s straight with you, told you the truth, and that chick can rot
#betrayal #heartbreak #backstabber #drama

Back in the day, as a young punk running with the crew in the neighborhood, we nabbed this poor bastard sprinting home, desperate to take a dump. The boys pinned his arms down tight, one of us laid into him with brutal kicks from worn-out soccer sneakers right to his ass, while another pressed down hard on his gut like a damn torture device. Result? The dude straight-up shat himself right there in front of the whole damn courtyard, a humiliating spectacle for all to see. That’s my story, raw and real.
#brutal #humiliation #streetlife #savage

Down in our little dump of a town, we’ve got a chick everyone calls "The Bricklayer."
She earned that filthy nickname in the most obvious way—getting down and dirty with a trio of dudes right on a construction site.
As for her age? Hell, let that shameful little secret stay buried in the rubble!
#smalltownscandal #notorious #wildlife #dirtysecrets

Alright, here’s the wild story.
I’m on a damn train, and suddenly, I’m horny as hell, gotta jerk off right now.
So, I’m like, screw it, full throttle, let’s do this!
But holy crap, I check the train toilet, and the flush is busted.
I dump it in the sink, but guess what? No freaking water in the tap either!
Without a second thought, I smear it around with some toilet paper to make it less obvious, cover up the crime scene, and slip out.
Then, boom, some old granny walks in to brush her teeth like nothing’s wrong!
#trainstories #wtf #awkward #noshamenogame

Greetings to this absolute trainwreck of a situation!
Let me break it down raw and dirty. Two years back, I crossed paths with this smoking hot chick—total eye candy, no doubt. But here’s the catch: she’s hauling baggage with two kids from her ex-hubby and had some dude on her arm at the time. Didn’t stop us though. Soon enough, we were banging like there’s no tomorrow, and damn, it was fire. Before long, I caught feelings hard, snatched her right from under that other guy’s nose, and we shacked up together.

Fast forward two months, I’m away on a work trip, she’s chilling at home—or so I thought. Turns out, she’s sneaking off to screw her ex. She came clean about it, and like a dumbass, I forgave her. Now, here’s the kicker: she’s about to pop out a kid, and I’m sitting here with my head spinning. Is it mine? Is it his? Hell if I know. What the fuck do I do?

👌- Dump her sorry ass, she’s a straight-up hoe.
😑- Hold off, wait for the kid to drop, get a DNA test, and then figure out the next move.
#drama #cheating #messylove #whatnow

A sewer pipe burst right on our street, and holy hell, the stench was unbearable, like a punch to the face with raw filth.
An hour dragged by, then two, and the air was still thick with the reek of pure crap.
And guess what? My little sister, bless her chaotic soul, decided to play hero in the most bizarre way—dumping Mom’s fancy-ass perfumes off the balcony to “freshen” the street.
We caught her red-handed on the fourth bottle, but by then, she’d already flushed about 25K rubles worth of designer scents into the stinking abyss below.
Now, what Mom’s gonna do to her when she finds out? That’s the real damn mystery—and I’m not sure I wanna be around for the explosion.
#sewerfail #perfumewaste #familydrama #wtf

Day 25. Got a tale about an old buddy of mine that’ll make you cringe and cackle. A bunch of us got together for a “classy” night of boozing—or, well, not so classy. Next morning, this absolute legend wakes up with a blank slate, no clue what went down. Turns out, the madman had been rolling around in God-knows-where, caked in filth, and the apartment? It reeked like a goddamn sewer. Why, you ask?

In the dead of night, half-asleep and still smashed, this genius felt nature’s call—the big one. In his drunken stupor, he somehow mistook a fancy-ass, top-dollar gaming chair (belonging to the host, no less) for the damn toilet. Yeah, he did his dirty deed right there, dumped a load on that poor chair, then just stumbled back to crash. Come morning, the horror show was revealed: shit was literally dripping down his legs, smeared across the bed, the floor, everywhere. It was a complete and utter shitstorm, folks. Absolute insanity! 🤣
#epicfail #drunkstories #wtf #shithappens

P20. So, yesterday I handed over my PC to my dumbass brother ‘cause he needed it for studying (some extra classes bullshit). Anyway, I was poking around on the computer later, decided to check my account balance, and holy shit—what do I see? A pathetic 11 rubles! I’m freaking the fuck out! I dive into the browser history, and this idiot has been flushing the cash I’ve been grinding for a car—20k straight to some trashy streamer chick with cringe-ass messages like “let’s date, babe.” On top of that, he dumped 120k into some shady online casino, lost every damn penny, and somehow racked up a 40k debt to boot. I’ve already dunked his sorry head in the village outhouse, and now I’m plotting what’s next. If you were me, what would you do?

🤣 - Dunk his head again for shits and giggles
😐 - Beat his ass and snitch to the parents
#familydrama #brothersucks #moneygone #wtf

My girl sometimes sleeps over, but lately she's been hiding her phone more and more.Last night her phone kept buzzing with messages from some "Mike - dentist 😊"I opened it. Read everything. Crystal **** clear.Sat there reading and couldn't decide - dump her **** right now or play games to make her feel the pain.Now she's sleeping next to me like nothing happened. And my head's on fire.#cheating #betrayal #relationshipfail #caught #trustissues #heartbreak #shameconfessions